Friday, May 23, 2014

Freedom // week 19

"The Gospel sets you free from you."

The freedom to draw near the Lord, unhindered.

The freedom to hear from the Lord.

The freedom of faith to journey with Him.

The freedom that comes from sacrificing myself in order to love another well.

The freedom from earthly things that death and troubles work in us, the freedom of everlasting Life that far exceeds death and troubles and is more than enough right here, right now.

The freedom from fear. Walking free in a spirit of love, power and a sound mind.

The freedom to be offended and not take offense.

The freedom of true comfort, of inconceivable peace, of fresh mercy.

The freedom of a jealous Lover's unrelenting love.

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My spirit is relishing freedom. My mind is wrapping around the concept of freedom. My life is taking on a visible pattern of freedom. It's a beautiful, incredible thing. In this season of life I am young, unentangled, full of dreams. There is a lot of freedom in that. Most people recognize this to be true. So I have the benefit of few expenses, few responsibilities, few ties. Oh, but it is so easy to entangle yourself. In fact it feels more natural to be tied up by much busyness, by comfort zones, by success. Freedom + faith is a road less traveled and it is not a cookie-cutter pattern you can follow, but this is what it is looking like for me.

A season of rest and refreshment at this time of my life, practically, looks like me living back at home with my family, no rent and no grocery bill, driving the same car I've always driven that is fully paid off and has an ever decreasing insurance bill. All kinds of little passions and pursuits are fitting together like a puzzle, in due time, after four years of working and waiting and wanting. The Lord is providing opportunity to launch a dream job of mine. The very day that He brought clarity to me of this dream and my heart was longing to work at it, He gave me the first gig within an hour. I went from being unemployed to being self-employed in my dream job. It's a lot of hard work and it does take time but I have the freedom of making my own schedule, of getting to travel, to create, to have my gas covered, to sit in coffee shops working and speaking life with a dear friend every week. As these gigs continue I don't have to have a full-time job so I have the freedom to take a part-time job instead, weeding at a local berry farm all summer. Two dream jobs. The first, my passion. The second, a blessing of some simple desires I had for this summer -- to work outside, to work with my hands, to dig in the dirt and see things grow.


This is my living right now and I make just enough to pay off credit card debt and set a bit aside for my next, less restful, season of life. I could get different jobs, I could seek after financial security purely, I could consume all my days with work and busyness and earnings, but I don't have to. I'm choosing not to. Why? Because having my needs met at the cost of a few hours of my week, frees me to give the rest of my time to others. I get to eat with my family, I get to see friends around their work schedules, I get to volunteer anytime, anywhere. The Lord wants to touch lives through mine and He is going to take care of my every need so I have the freedom of time and mobility to do that. And He always will. He is limitless. Let's not limit Him. As responsibilities and expenses increase, there will still be freedom because that freedom is not produced by me, its from Jesus and He desires to and delights to give it.

Meanwhile freedom is shooting fresh roots deep in the soil of my open and vulnerable heart. It's intricate and intimate work done by a Hand that knows me. I am being freed from the fear of being abandoned while traveling through the valley of the shadow, of being forsaken when death comes in life. Not physical death, just seasons of death, of loss. Life is stirring. There's a horizon in sight, though there's a long road ahead to get to it. But in the deepest, saddest, most confusing, most hurtful places He was there with me. He never left my side. We journeyed through together from the first step into the valley all the way to this point. He. Never. Left. Me. I CANNOT LOSE HIM. I'm not out of the sad and confusing and ouch, but His Love has driven out the fear. Where the Spirit of the Lord is there is freedom.

2 comments:

  1. Amen. What a refreshing season for you! The freedom of Christ is sweet. I love how all-encompassing His freedom is, setting us free from all sorts of bondage that we or others might create.
    Beautiful picture, too! :) I notice that is the Anthro dress, right? You look gorgeous in it.

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    1. It is the Anthro dress. :) Thank you!

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