I'm not the only one who needs to be given permission to do this, am I? Do you wait for it too? Ever since I got real sick from too much stress I've gotten brave enough to give myself permission but I still like to get it from people in my life. Not pity permission, "Oh honey! You owe it to yourself to put your feet up!", but just a simple desire for my best, reminders to slow down and affirmation for finding balance.
Finding balance. It's a big-kid thing. It's a pairing of dreams and hard work, of saving and splurging, time management and spontaneity. Our God knows the balance. He insists that working diligently rather than being lazy is in our best interest. He also makes rest a necessary blessing.
Talking to Momma on the phone the other day she was affirming me for my bravery in operating in a constant state of out-of-my-comfort-zone over the past three months. I've been living in the land of adventure, facing new challenges and making discoveries, solving problems and taking care of "all the things" in my independent-21-year-old life. It takes diligence and fearlessness and a lot of grace, for those around me and for myself.
I packed up my New Jersey home and dove straight into a week of travels and conferences. When they finished I gave myself permission to sleep in and turn in early for bed but my back and legs, still aching from toting my luggage through several airports in a short weekend, weren't rested, they were put to work rearranging furniture (some that was quite heavy and I got scolded lovingly for for moving on my own), cleaning my new abode (dubbed the "Gypsy den" by Zachary as it is another temporary nest for this crazy traveling gal), and unpacking all my belongings. Yesterday I worked for nine hours straight getting things settled. I nearly fell asleep on the couch watching Chopped at 8:30pm and decided to go to bed early. Zach was on the same page.
Zachary: Well I am off to bed. Hoping for a full nights rest.
Me: Same. Haven't slept well in like a week.
Zachary: Yeah its prob bc you havent been sitting still much. From NY - PA - OH - TX.
Me: True.
Zachary: Just relax some.
Me: Thanks :)
Permission. Today I have a fridge to scrub and a grocery list calling my name but rather than diving headlong into it all I'm starting with some relaxing, listening to jazz music and drinking my English breakfast tea in bed, becoming acquainted with the way the sunshine streams in the windows here. That's what balance looks like today.
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